


cigarettes before sex

by uke_kira



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Anxiety, Beta Read, Drinking, Halloween, I'm Bad At Tagging, Kissing, M/M, Panic Attacks, Sloppy Makeouts, Smoking, Social Anxiety, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, halloween party
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-02
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-13 11:40:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,693
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29152923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/uke_kira/pseuds/uke_kira
Summary: “Fuck…”Why did this have to happen now? He was doing just fine and now this...Suddenly a noise came from the balcony door - it was Sykkuno.
Relationships: Corpse Husband & Sykkuno (Video Blogging RPF), Corpse Husband/Sykkuno (Video Blogging RPF), Corpsekkuno - Relationship
Comments: 64
Kudos: 440





	cigarettes before sex

**Author's Note:**

> I want to thank my great friend Via. She beta read this for me and is basically a co-writer, so... Thanks luv, I couldn’t do it without you.
> 
> This is a work of fiction and just my shitty way of coping. I heavily relate to Corpse and I project my problems onto him so please, don’t ship people. Really. 
> 
> Also english is not my first language so please, excuse my grammar mistakes.

The OfflineTV house was having a Halloween party. It was the usual squad Corpse was used to playing games with, no one foreign. He didn't bother much with a costume, but neither did the others. He was dressed in all black as usually, silver chains and rings and a little bit of eyeliner. Black mask hiding half of his face, not quite comfortable without it around the others yet. He could say he went as an e-boy or something, but everyone knew this was how he usually dressed.

He was feeling a little nervous, his hands becoming sweaty, as he shyly sat on the couch with the others until Toast and Scarra brought some alcohol.

The night was going pretty well. They had a few drinks, watched a movie, played videogames, laughed, talked and overall just enjoyed each other and the night. There were no cameras, no audience. Only the occasional selfie was taken here and there. It was much more relaxing for Corpse this way.

He did start feeling a little anxious though - felt the weird feeling slowly creeping into his chest. He drank the white claw in his hand bottom up, but that didn’t really seem to work. His heart started pounding even more and suddenly everything became overwhelmingly loud.

He needed to get out.

Thankfully, he knew the house well enough to find the balcony without needing any help. The big glass door was heavier than he remembered, but he still opened and closed it with ease.

The night was cold for California, but it was bearable. His shaking hands started searching for a small box in his jacket-pocket. When he pulled it out, there were only a few cigarettes and a lighter inside. He slid his mask down under his chin and put one between his lips. Struggling to light it, he put his unsteady hands against the fence for at least some support and pocketed the box. Finally, a shaky breath followed by a cloud of smoke escaped his mouth.

_Okay Corpse, you can do this. It's nothing unusual._

“Fuck…” his head fell to his hands, the heels of his palms pushing his eyes deep into his skull.

Why did this have to happen _now_? He was doing just fine, having fun with his friends… and now _this_.

Suddenly a noise came from the balcony door and Corpse's hand immediately shot up to his face, fixing his mask.

It was just Sykkuno.

“Hey…” he said with a soft voice.

“Hi.”

“You disappeared, I was worried.” No response.

Corpse really didn't feel like talking right now.

“Are you alright?” Sykkuno tried again. Nothing, just silence. “I didn't know you smoke. You know, it's not healthy, you shouldn't-”

“Sykkuno, as much as I appreciate your concern, this is really not the right time… ”

“Well, just so you know, I'm always here if you wanna, like… talk, okay? I mean, you don't have to, if you don’t want to, I'm just saying…”

Corpse felt his chest tighten. Tears started to rush to his eyes. He didn't want to cry in front of his friend though, so he just kept blinking them away.

“I get overwhelmed, too, sometimes… when I'm in public for too long, or when I like, uh, have to talk to a stranger.” he awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck, just to do something with his hands.

Corpse noticed this cute gesture of his. Sykkuno did it often on stream.

“Yeah, but you guys aren't strangers…” Sykkuno could hear the distress in his friend's voice.

It upset him a little. He really wanted to help Corpse - he knew about his mental health, his struggles with socializing and anxiety. He was familiar with the relapses and the panic attacks. He knew, he himself was a very shy and reserved person, but this wasn't the same. This was completely different.

“I know, but whatever you're feeling right now, it's completely normal and-and I'm not – by any means – judging you or, um… thinking badly about you.”

Corpse felt like he couldn't hold it together anymore. There was an uncomfortable lump in his throat, which choked back his words. Tears rolled down his cheeks, soaking into the black fabric covering his face. His head turned to face Sykkuno and he saw the compassion in the smaller man's eyes. Corpse felt weak and disgusted by himself.

“I'm-I'm sorry I ruined your, uh… night.” smiling through tears, he wiped his eyes with his free hand and put out the half-smoked cigarette. It left a black spot on the fence. “And s-sorry for making a mess.”

“Corpse, just breathe… You didn't ruin anything. We're just looking at the moon and talking about our feelings, no big deal, right?”

“Right…” he smiled.

It fascinated the younger how calm and kind Sykkuno was. It wasn't only an internet persona, he really was one of the most humble people Corpse has ever met. His voice was soothing and his presents just made everything so much better.

Sykkuno stepped a little closer and put his hand on Corpse's back, stroking it gently. “Crying is healthy, y’know, just saying.” a shy smile settled on his lips as he pulled his hand back.

Sykkuno was hesitating. The silence and the lack of any response were making him nervous. Was it too straight-forward? Was he just making Corpse even more uncomfortable?

_Ah, he shouldn’t have done it! He should’ve just kept his hands to himself! What if Corpse takes it the wrong way-_

His unwanted thoughts were interrupted by Corpse's raspy voice. “Can I kiss you?”

The moment these words fell out of his mouth, Corpse wished he never said them.

_Oh my god, what was he doing. Why did he just casually throw that out?_

Corpse looked Sykkuno in the eyes and expected a confused look, maybe even a slap. But instead, what he got was a calm and soft: “Yes.”

It really didn't shock Corpse as much as he thought it would - the realization that he wanted to kiss the man standing in-front of him. Of course, he could platonically appreciate the attractiveness of other men, but he never really thought about one in that way. But he was also pretty confident in his heterosexuality until now, so…

Sykkuno just made him feel… different. A good kind of different. Maybe the best kind of different.

“Can you- ehm…” he cleared his throat, “…can you close your eyes?”

“Oh, um, yeah, sure…” Sykkuno was getting nervous too. But he did as he was told and Corpse pulled his mask down.

Sykkuno took in a sharp breath when the others hand stroked his cheek gently. His thumb ghosted across his partly opened lips, tracing them affectionately.

Corpse then decided to bend down. He brushed his lips against Sykkuno’s lightly and pulled away again. Sykkuno tried to lift his head a little higher but Corpse leaned down to his ear. An almost inaudible whisper, low and husky, resonated through his body, straight into his stomach and crotch. “Are you sure?”

“Ah um, y-yes.” he barely held back a moan.

He was getting so impatient, it was actually embarrassing. He felt his face heat up and he could swear it was bright red by now. But Corpse was being such a tease! He just couldn’t help himself… Corpse finally decided to close the distance between them, and kiss him. Sykkuno let out a breath, he didn't know he was holding. Deepening their kiss, he grabbed Corpse by the waist and pulled him closer.

The kiss was soft and slow, a little hesitant at first. Corpse tasted of cigarettes and alcohol which Sykkuno thought was honestly kind of hot. He felt like a teenager again, kissing the bad boy everyone was too intimidated by in highschool to even approach.

Once they got familiar with each other, the kisses got more passionate, full of emotion and heat.

Corpse found himself tangling his fingers into Sykkuno's hair and pulling on it, which drew a soft moan from the man beneath him. That little sound made Corpse’s dick twitch.

He pushed lightly on the other, backing him up against whatever he could - which ended up being the half-closed glass door of the balcony. The man beneath him let out an involuntary whine and Corpse smirked into the kiss. Pleased with himself, he licked Sykkuno's bottom lip as a silent plea for consent. Sykkuno opened his mouth, which was a good enough of an invitation for Corpse's tongue. The kisses started getting sloppier, wetter and messier but neither of them really cared.

Sykkuno's fingers curled around the zippered-edge of his jacked, pulling him as close as possible. Their rapidly raising chests were pushed tightly against each other. Their short, hot breaths mixing as they tried to hold onto each other’s lips for as long as possible. They didn’t want to stop, but the need for air was beginning to be too much.

Pulling away reluctantly, Sykkuno searched for Corpses face and gently stroked his cheeks. Both of them were panting, their lips wet with saliva and cheeks visibly redder. And the bulges in their pants talked for themselves. They stayed there for a while, foreheads pressed together, holding onto each other. Just catching their breaths…

“I, um…” Sykkuno started first, “We-we should like…”

“Huh?” Corpse was still startled by whatever just happened.

“They're gonna start looking for us…” he let go of Corpse and went to open his eyes, but stopped the moment Corpse spoke up again.

“Could you just…” he hurriedly put on his mask, “Yeah, okay… thanks… You can-you can open your eyes now.” Sykkuno smiled up kindly and opened his eyes, starting to adjust his hair and clothes.

“But ahrm… yeah you're right, we should-we should go.”

Corpse opened the door for them and let Sykkuno go first. They started walking back into the living room, but before they got there, Sykkuno stopped and turned around to face Corpse. He placed his hand on his neck, stroking it with his thumb and pulled him closer. Gave him a little tentative peck on the lips and whispered: “I hope you're staying the night.”

Corpse was left speechless.

> **Author's Note:**

> I could do a part two if you want...


End file.
